no sleep tonight

i cannot sleep.

two of my favorite things about good friends:
#1. laughing with them
#2. deep conversations

today i did both.
and now i can't sleep.

2009 is going to be the year of adventures. i have a lot of goals and plans i need to achieve before the big 2010.
here are a few of my resolutions:

resolution the first:
be a better pen pal to good ole' jonathan in australia.

resolution the second:
come home at a DECENT HOUR each night. or at least most nights...

resolution the third:
get a summer job away from provo, or do a study abroad in the fall. or both. preferably both.

resolution the fourth:
discover a new, amazing cool hobby.


sweet dreams (are made of this)

what an eventful week.

it was incredibly busy and crazy, but i managed to catch a few laughs among the stress.

laugh #1:
lauren my roomie gets a call from the police. "we found your stolen car."
what's funny is that she didn't know it was stolen... apparently it was taken for a joyride without her knowledge.

laugh #2:
bad looking horse. how would you feel if that was your name?


factory girls

congratulations maggie for winning my song o' the week contest!

i was thinking today about the name margaret. obviously, since maggie doesn't go by her "real" name, she is accustomed to what i'm sure are an array of over-used, funny or sometimes annoying nicknames. margaret, maggie, marge, midge, mags, margarine... i'm sure she's heard them all.

if you think about it, you reach a point in your life when you've heard pretty much every possible nickname that can be squeezed from your name. I'm just glad my parents were sane enough to spare me from a name with a terrible rhyme or just terrible in general.
in all honesty, you could call me camel or chameleon. but that's not very offensive.

i, however, recently came in contact with someone who gave me a new nickname.

camilla ice.

YES. it is now official. i shall be known as camilla ice and camilla ice alone.

the only problem is that i can't remember who dubbed me this glorious title.


will the birds they put in cages

today elena asked me a very important question.

she said, "what is your theme song for this week?"
and i realized that i had better get one.
first i said "work" by jimmy eat world. then i changed my mind to "holiday" by boys like girls. then i went through all my favorite vampire weekend songs, but nothing fit. i now find myself in a predicament; i am songless for this week.

so i'm open to suggestions for a song. whoever wins will get a prize (which is yet to be determined, but will probably involve something delicious or something like a hug. or maybe i'll dedicate my next blog post to you).

to guide you in your song suggestions, here are some words that are going to describe this week:
  • delicious
  • anticipation
  • distracted
  • busy
  • family
  • fun
  • contemplating
  • radiant
  • and twitterpated


just push play

last night some friends and i were discussing the beautiful and wonderful invention that is youtube. nothing on the internet can compare to its glory. so just for fun, here is a list of a few of the favorite clips listed on my youtube profile.
frank caliendo seinfeld 2027
jay j. armes, private investigator
funny cleaning commercial
walk it out fosse
pirates of the caribbean: organ style
chris crocker--girls love their gays!
chris brown and elmo
obama and mccain dance off
vitas opera 2
toy story/dark knight trailer


just kiss me

my "things that i love" list grew today.

i love

chairs that are too big for my feet to touch the ground


pocketful of sunshine

after making my royal blog decree (see the last post), i was tempted to list my top 10 most played songs on my ipod and interpret what that means about me.
but i decided against this after i realized many of these songs are slightly embarrassing and could possibly reveal more about my character than i wish people to know.

instead, i have decided to rant about my creepiness. wait--let's put that in quotations. "creepiness." i say it in quotations because i personally do not think i am creepy. but it has come to my attention that other people might get the creepy drift coming from me. be aware, however, that this realization has not come suddenly. i have been aware of people's curiosity towards my obsessions for quite some time now, but never felt encouraged to address it until last night.
you see, last night i was talking with one of my avid fans: my mother. i was giving her the usual update on my college life, and told her about a job i recently got working at the library. i explained that i was surprised i even got the job in the first place because half the time i was explaining to my supervisors my obsession with serial killers.

one of the people interviewing me said, "you mean, like jack the ripper?"
and my hand flew to my heart and i exclaimed, "oh yes, he's one of my favorites!"

i never would have given that a second thought, but my mom burst out laughing and said i was weird. (speaking of which, "weird" is a strange word. i think it means something different to everyone who uses it.)

serial killers! vampires! gothic horror and medieval torture! voodoo, paganism, cannibals and witchcraft! you name it, i've either read, watched or listened to it. as louise durham, the infamous AP english teacher at my high school would say, i have a "fascination with the abomination."
i don't know why i get such a kick out of reading about john wayne gacy the "killer clown" whose victims were little boys. or vlad tepes III, the inspiration of dracula who loved to impale his not-so-loyal subjects.
but while we're on the subject of dracula, let's discuss my recent loss of interest in vampires. one word/book: twilight.
LAMEness to the maximum.
real vampires are NOT like edward cullen, i tell you that much.

but back to the point: what i tell people over and over, is that i'm "only creepy on the inside." i'm not like one of those crazies who go walzing around town in a black trench coat or has an ugly emo haircut.

so even though my favorite movies include man-eating plants and murderous demons, i am a normal person. i promise.
in fact, i'm scared of things: dinosaus, aliens, bears, baldness, and loving someone who doesn't love me back. (gone with the wind? i cried like a baby. my worst fear.)

but i only appreciate tasteful horror, murder and superstition. for example, tim burton. genius. but hardcore punk, scream-o gothic heavy metal music? nooooo, sir.

not in nottingham

royal blog decree:
i, camille, do hereby proclaim that every blog post from here on out shall be the title of a song.



today, the number of "best compliments i have ever received in my life" rose to three.
yes, i have heard a total of three compliments that have pretty much changed my life.

or, at least made me really, really happy.

compliment #1:
once, when i was a young child of 14, i was having a conversation with a sweet old man in my neighborhood. he is what my sister and i call a "rosebud"--an extremely kind, grandpa-like old person who you just want to hug. "rosebuds" are wise, happy, and always caring.
this particular "rosebud" and i were having a typical how-are-you-doing-these-days conversation, when he smiled at me and almost got teary eyed.
"you make me wish i had more sons."

... can you say, precious?
i almost said "you make me wish you had more sons!"
but instead, i just blushed and stood slack-jawed.

compliment #2
when i am bored at my parents house i sit myself at the piano and play pretty much every single scrap of sheet music i can get my hands on. usually i rotate between a book of classical pieces and a collection of disney solos.
on one particular day last summer i was playing from the disney book ("part of your world," from the little mermaid).
my mom was on the phone in the kitchen. when she hung up, she came in to me and said the friend she had been talking to had commented on my music in the background.
"that's a beautiful CD you're listening to."

i was so happy... mostly because whenever i play the piano, my sister says something like "if you play that song one more time i'm going to kill you."

it's too bad that my mom replied by saying, "CD? oh, that's just camille." and then she laughed.

compliment #3
today i was talking with a friend in one of my classes. i was telling him that i thought one of his good friends was a really cute guy, but way out of my league.
DISCLAIMER: i promise and swear on my life i was not fishing for compliments. i despise it when people act overly humble just to demand praise from others. i was merely stating a fact. this particular guy is much more talented, attractive, and likable than me: thus he is out of my league.
anyway, his friend just looked at me and said, "um, have you looked in the mirror lately? no one is out of your league."

but then again, maybe it's just because my hair was straightened today. my unfortunately natural curly locks would have never gotten such praise.

nonetheless, i feel very
¸.·´¸.·*´¨) ¸.·*¨)
(¸.·´ (¸.·´ happy inside.


all work and no play makes camille a dull boy

mmm. halloween, and i love the shining.

i am at work right now. words cannot express how much i love my job...
i am a student-athlete tutor, so basically anyone who plays BYU sanctioned sports can come to me for help. it's the best job, hands down.
i get paid to meet all sorts of awesome people.

but times like this--when i sit in the student athletic building and wait for someone to come visit me--get really boring.

so i am watching tv shows on my computer. hooray :)


to vote? or not to vote. and oh how i love...

the organ.
it conquers my soul.

so i just signed up for practice times on these two amazing organs on BYU campus;

it's really awesome--and bizarre--that i find practicing the organ so enjoyable.

anyway, i'm learning a saWEET piece right now that my organ teacher gaver me: prelude and fugue in g minor by johann sebastian bach. i tell you what: i'm a regular phantom of the opera. just give me a white porcelain mask and i'll stay in the basement of the HFAC for time and all eternity.

in other news, i met obama!

hmm. now i feel obligated to vote for him.

it's a shame i don't plan on voting at all. i mean, i'm not very impressed with any of the canditates. and rather than choosing the lesser of two evils, i think i'll go out for ice cream.
but i'm a little bummed that this is the first time i've ever gotten to vote and i'm not taking advantage of it. maybe i'll just vote for someone random that i know has no chance in heck of winning, then researching who i voted for. HAH that could be funny.
all in all, i hate politicians.
speaking of...

guess who's running for governor?
yes, that's right... "totally awesome computers" dell! anyone else remember seeing his commercials on tv? good times.


curly hair is the BANE of my existence!

i am having an inner conflict on what to do. to cut? or not to cut?

i have been growing out my hair for the past two years. it's pretty long now. but it's also pretty annoying. and just not pretty in general.

so i've been looking for a good picture of how i want to cut my hair.
but every picture i see of someone with "curly hair" is NOT CURLY. AT ALL.
hellooooo people! this is NOT curly hair!
stupid denise richards. i don't even know who you are. but you and your so not-natural curls can go back to the salon from whence you came.
i just get so annoyed with hair. bleh. it's so frustrating that pictures of stupid celebrities that look like this come up every time i google "curly hair."

i have curly hair. ME!

oh man. people just don't even understand.

wow... this picture is from last summer. hah i forgot i even had it. i love my purple bedroom. and my purple hair.
sadly enough, i don't have a good recent picture of my hair. but right now it's quite a bit longer than this.
try to use your imagination.

anywho, i just spent my evening racing around town on a motorcycle with paul. motorcycles are sooooo cool. yeah, i'm feeling pretty sweet right now.

and pretty tired.
good night.


long time, no blog

well, well, well. summer finally came to a depressing end, and school has slumped back into session.
i'm living in an apartment just south of campus, and it's sooooo conveniently close. nothing gives me greater joy :D
except for the fact that my best friend is getting MARRIED! what is the world coming to? i can't believe it! i've been so tight with carah since 8th grade and now she's engaged. pretty much, i'm being ditched for a much taller, older boy.
marriage terrifies me. but apparently it isn't as fearsome to carah.

i went to the utah state fair rodeo on sunday with elena. i love rodeos!
it was really fun. elena was explaining the "hotness levels" of all the guys who compete. there's the bull riders, team ropers, cattle wrestlers, etc. each has their own level of attractiveness--according to elena.

well, i must finish my essay for biology now. however, this has been a very cathartic distraction session. i have a feeling there will be many more to come this school year...


expuhlosion, five beautiful rings and TMJ

i am going to EXPLODE because i am feeling so many emotions right now.

man, life sucks.

and--on top of everything--i have a sunburn and look like a tomato.

but the olympics are officially the coolest thing since sliced bread. well, technically they came before sliced bread, but whatever. michael phelps is seriously an alien sent to earth from some crazy water planet. and i think that lochte swimmer guy is totally cute.

it has recently come to my attention that i have TMJ disorder, a.k.a. lockjaw. my jaw totally clicks whenever i chew, talk, or even just move it for fun. my TMJ discs are out of place or something...? anywho, at the dentist two days ago my jaw totally locked on the little x-ray plastic stick the nice dental assistant lady asked me to bite down on. i felt really bad for her because she couldn't get it out of my mouth. but i felt even worse for me, who was experiencing a pain no human should ever have in their mouth.

but, back to my explosion. i am freaking pissed off. i think i'll go cry now.


$6 jeans and hot flare pants

i was late to work yesterday, but i have a very good excuse. i work at tie one on, the tie store in the university mall. as i was walking through the mall to get to work, i walked past pacsun and happened to notice a huge "70% off" sign. so i went in, tried on some jeans, but realized there wasn't a price tag. i decided to take them up to the register anyway, and it turns out they were SIX DOLLARS. $6 jeans!

what a beautiful thing. nothing makes me happier.

last night i went to a sweet abba concert. man, i wish i had been a child of the 70's. those songs are so great.


IT'S JULY! and sad disney movies.

oh my july is the best month in the world, for these reasons and more:

5. i'm not in school. school=the devil
4. the weather. in july, we have that lovely, roasting sun which burns me to a crisp. however, i like looking like toast.
3. the holidays. namely, the fourth of july--which is my favorite holiday EVER. for practically all of july there are holidays which give you the excuse to blow things up with wonderful fireworks.
2. you can do all sorts of things outside. it's warm enough and the sun doesn't go down until late, so biking, boarding and swimming are always an option.
1. and other reasons that i probably just can't think of right now. but trust me... they exist.

last week at work my friend and i decided that the two most tragic disney movies are bambi and the fox and the hound. why on earth any child would enjoy these films is beyond my mental capacity.


oh my

my friends are getting married and it's
it's just making me realize that some day, i might also get married. and that's even weirder.
last night i was talking to travis about how immature i am. there is no way i could ever get married anytime soon.

anyway... i don't really have much else to say.

a few days ago i straightened my hair. i don't do it that often, but whenever i do, i always get a ton of compliments. i remember when i did it during the school year, more guys would talk to me, and people always mentioned my hair. it's really annoying because it makes me realize that i must look really ugly whenever i have my naturally curly hair.

curse you, curls. bane of my existence.



i was just reading my last post and it kind of doesn't make sense. how can new friends become old? huh... some of my good friends i've known for years. but my best friend i've only known for about one and half.

thus, i have contradicted myself once again.
now, amuse yourself with this clip i found on our camera from our cali trip.

hah! this is such a typical conversation between me, my mom, brother gavin, and i think you can hear my other brother andrew pipe in every now and then.
as usual, i am just singing and quoting movies.

my sister hates it when i sing. what the crap... that really bugs me.

kelly, my sweet-awesome-cool neighbor just got back from spending a few months in russia teaching english. she said over there it's considered bad luck to whistle indoors.
gosh! i can't sing indoors here, because my sister will fillet my skin. and i can't whistle on the other side of the world. *sigh* i guess i'll just have to learn to be quiet.


cell phone ringtones

i believe you can tell a lot about a person by their cell phone ringtone.
two years ago i was working at a place that shall remain nameless. my boss was--dare i say it--a free spirit. to the max. every so often his phone would ring and my ears were pierced with the whining x-files theme song. needless to say, i hope he found his tractor beam and returned to his home planet.
i just started a new job this week, "tie one on," the neck tie store in the university mall. anywho, this guy who was training me kept getting text messages. so, every so often, i had the privilege of hearing the star wars "empire strikes back" melody. that alone told me more answers about this dude than he ever would have told me if i had asked him questions.
carah, bosom friend, also has an entertaining ring; this hawaiian chant from the young women's general choir leader. in all honesty, there is no way to put this analysis to words. it just describes her perfectly and that's that.
so what does my ring tone say about me? hmm. good question. but i'll let you do the analysis.

earlier today i played tennis with this cool guy, jon. my amazing skills squashed him 6-3 and 6-0.
ok, maybe i'm exaggerating. it was more of my amazing luck that caused me to do so well. anyway, since he lost he bought me an amazing cheesecake shake that i will now forever crave. anywho, he's a cool guy and i hope we hang out more.
i never really know how to go about hanging out with new people. it's kind of an awkward thing. you are always like "hey, we should hang out some time!" but then both of you know it will never happen. it's almost like an unwritten rule that you don't actually call the person. because, you know that if you do, it will be an awkward conversation and if by some random reason you actually DO hang out, you'll both be like "so what should we do?"

so this is why old friends are the best kind. new friends are exciting and curious, and sometimes even attractive (hmm. good bonus). but old friends are the ones you can always ask "hey, when are we going to hang out?" and they'll actually answer and actually call.


rocking back and forth in a corner

AAAACK! i ordered a wave board off of amazon.com a few days ago and it's just not coming fast enough!!!
i got "the wave" by Street Surfing.
i don't really have anything else to say, i just needed to vent my frustration with mail. i wish everything in my life was instant... i have no patience.



i just got back from the greatest trip evah.
i've decided that disneyland is not only the happiest place on earth, but one of my reasons for living... hah
this year's theme at disneyland is "year of a million dreams" so there are these people who run around the park called the "dream team." we won these dream fastpasses that got us to the front of lines, and on another occasion we won some cool "year of a million dreams" mickey mouse ear hats.
i ran into friends at the park on monday night. i was talking to carah about what she thought of disneyland, because she was so young last time she went she hardly remembers it. she told me how impressed she was with how the disneyland people payed attention to every detail--and it's totally true. i never realized it, but that's totally where disneyland gets it's magic: from the tiny details. even standing in line for a ride is entertaining because there is so much to look at. all the people who work there are dressed to fit the atmosphere of the ride they are operating, and, come on, who doesn't like seeing life-size versions of their favorite cartoon characters walzing down the sidewalk next to you?
but, above all, the greatest and most magical addition to the great disneyland atmosphere is the music. everywhere you go there is music playing from speakers that make you feel you are really in the future, west, or fantasyland.
i went on the new finding nemo submarine ride. it was cute... but now i know i never have to go on it again ;)
and one last note: if anyone is going to california adventure soon, you MUST see the aladdin show! it is freaking amazing! and take me with you...



i have given into the evil clutches of technology and gotten a cell phone.
i know, i know. i'm going against my nature and i have lost my identity.
but i was beginning to think it was a necessary evil.
here's what i got, one uh 'dem samsung katalysts: http://www.samsung.com/us/consumer/detail/detail.do?group=mobilephones&type=mobilephones&subtype=t_mobile&model_cd=SGH-T739TSATMB
so far i am pleased with my cellular phone choice.
anyway, i need to take an online final now.


wave boards rock my body... no pun

my latest and greatest obsession are wave boards. also known as wave sticks, street surfers or rip sticks.
i command everyone to learn how, so they can come on rides with me.
it took me three days of practice to become good enough to go down streets easily, but i've seen other people who are naturals.
they are basically skateboards that swivel and have only two wheels.

another confession: i am also obsessed with this song i heard in travis' car. it's called "into the ocean" by blue october from their album foiled. i just bought it off of itunes and now i'm listening to it on repeat :)
one thing i don't understand, is that it's marked as "explicit." there are no swear words whatsoever, and i even looked up the words. there are no innuendos or hidden meanings or anything (but then again, i might just be naive. but i doubt it). i wonder if it's just because some of their other songs on the album are censor-worthy.

at any rate, i have a date with colin firth. that is, i'm going to watch the A & E pride and prejudice until i fall asleep.


i work at pudding on the rice

i work at pudding on the rice.
in fact, that's where i am right now.
allison--a cook at the store--showed me this blog about pudding and i thought it was quite entertaining.


amy thaut, the girl who snaps back at this "a friend" character, is the wife of one of the owners. in fact, allison is her mom-in-law.
they're quite the cool family.
but i digress.

i can see where this "a friend" person is coming from, but i totally don't agree. it's true that i'm going to be biased because it is this illustrious establishment that pays for my jamba juices. still, i don't agree with him at all.
all the thauts wanted to do was share something cool with provo, and they just got scolded for it.
what's stupid, is that this "a friend" posted his comment like a year ago. if amy hadn't responded to him, none of this argument would have happened.
but i like a good fight and will probably say something on this utahgossip site just to keep the argument alive and entertaining.

now, since you are reading this, i'll put in my plug for pudding.

eat at pudding on the rice! it is the coolest, hippest place in provo. for as low as $1.99, you can treat yourself to a unique and incredibly delicious treat. i highly recomment the instant karmel flavor, or opiate of the masses.


calling all occupants of interplanetary craft

i am taking a test today that determines if i get into the communications program. AAAAAH!
i'm scared but i think i'll do pretty well. i just have to write some sort of news article after listening to a press conference.
travis woke me up this morning at 6:38. hate him. but not really, since it was the last time i'll see him since next wednesday. :(
on tuesday night me and carah downloaded the kid nation episodes for her to watch on her computer.
holy CRAP kid nation has changed my life. that reality show is the best thing to grace this planet since sliced bread. all the kids are so amazing... and since it's a reality show, it's so great to know they are actually real kids in this country!
my favorites are alex and laurel.
alex is a hilarious snaggle-toothed genius. oh my gosh just thinking about him makes me laugh.
laurel is a beautiful. she's an amazing leader. she can sing better than anyone in the world. plus, we both have purple headbands. thus, she also has excellent taste.

so, go watch kid nation before you die. and since i have all of season one, maybe you should just call me and i'll watch it with you. :)
well now i must go meet my quality friend blair for an interview. blech. i'm writing an article for my news writing class on non-LDS students at BYU. it should be interesting.


sitting, waiting, wishing

here i sit at my parent's house.

i wish i had a car.

because then i wouldn't be here waiting for my sister to come back from soccer practice to come take me back to my apartment. my sister, for whom i just spent two hours of my life editing a movie for her history homework. my sister, who now owes me her soul.

oh well. i guess i'll just play ticket to ride while i wait.
for those of you who have never played ticket to ride, you have not truly lived.
the day i discovered you could play the game online was the day my life was completed. me and lauren, my roommate, have been bloody obsessed. every once and awhile aubrey plays with us. aubrey is the "diseased" roommate who is never even at our apartment. thus, me and lauren have bonded over board games.

travis is gone for a week in d.c. this means i need to find fun things to do this weekend. apparently wyview apartments have been invited to this semi-formal dance thing along with the heritage apartments on campus. i want to go, but don't know if i will because i don't know who i'd go with. as my mom said, "just go, eat food, then leave."
she can sometimes be filled with wisdom.

i'm not quite sure who will be reading this, so i'm assuming whoever does already knows me. thus, i am not explaining any of the people or places i talk about because it's likely that you already get it.

and on that note, i'm leaving to play ticket to ride.



well, well. look at me.
i created my own blog for a number of reasons. and that number is 3.

1. i think. a lot. and i write. a lot. but my journals don't seem to be enough. so it's cool to have another place to talk to no one about what i think about life in general.
2. i always look at other people's blogs because i think it shows who they are.

3. my dad is hoping everyone in the world will come to my blog and eventually advertisers will pay me $70,000 a month like that one 16 year old who makes bank off her myspace page.

but so far i'm off to an anxious start. it took me like a half hour to finally settle on a stupid name for my blog. i'm such an indecisive person; just ask travis, he can attest to this. and i hate commitments. what if i don't like the name of my blog? what if i want to change it? oh, the horror!
i think that is one of the main reasons i still don't have a cell phone. i just can't get myself to sign a two year contract with some cell phone company demanding my money, freedom and soul.
eventually i settled on a name (pensées heureuses: it's french for "happy thoughts." i found that appropriate because a. i speak french, b. i just watched hook with my roommates a few days ago, and c. maybe if i write enough happy thoughts i can fly away to neverland).
but i also have other plaguing worries. what if--as my dad pointed out--future employers find my blog and decide they don't want to hire me? what if something i say leaks out into the uncontrollable internet and i create a gang of camille-hating enemies?
oh well. their loss.
because here i go!