avant garden

wow. i think i should just take pictures of my hair every morning.

it never ceases to amaze me.

this elegant updo was a result of me falling asleep on the lovesac with my hair still in a ponytail. gotta love it.

in other news,

andy goldsworthy=my favorite person in the world.

his art is all made with nature. for example, he uses water or thorns to hold leaves together.

he also does sweet things with mud.

and he likes to play with sticks and ice.

he also lies down during rain or snow to create "rain shadows."

hats off to you, andy.

sleeping in

i love sleeping in.

this is me right now.

glamorous, no?

i have quite the sex hair.

run away home

yesterday i experienced something strange.

i said goodbye to my roommate that i have lived with for the past two years of college.

WEIRD.

we aren't living together next year. college will be a strange experience without her.

things i learned from lauren:

• excellent game strategies, namely ticket to ride.
• transformations are the best. especially when they involve a beast turning into a prince.
• poppyseed chicken is the best thing in the entire world.
• coloring is not only for first-graders.
• i have long, graceful limbs.
• procrastinating never gets you anywhere.
• watching people make out through a peephole is both hilarious and educational.
• brunettes have way more fun.

quality lauren quotes:

"harlot. some words are just pleasant..."

"i don't want sperm swimming inside of me!"

"mneh," "rreh," and other delightful sounds

"how delightful."

"i find myself strangely drawn to him."

"that is acceptable."

glass danse

today, i woke up in a condo in sunny st. george.

that was nice.

what was not nice, however, was the noise that woke me up.

a groundskeeper was using a hedge trimmer to manicure the grass in the back of our complex. i was annoyed that he felt it necessary to use such a noisy power tool at eight in the morning.

CRACK

all of a sudden, there was a loud sound.

"andrew," said my brother gavin who was sleeping near me, "what did you do?"

andrew, our youngest brother had been dancing around the condo for about a half an hour. it's a strange phenomenon that younger kids refuse to sleep while on vacation. "i didn't do it," andrew insisted.

i decided to sit up and put on my glasses. i heard a trickling, cracking sound like rain.

there in the sliding glass door, was an enormous crack.

apparently mr. hedge trimmer had felt it necessary to pick up a rock and pitch it at the window.

even now as i am typing this, i can still hear the window cracking. i bet it shatters within an hour.

hella good

best discovery of yesterday?

f my life.

have you ever had a crappy day/experience and want to tell the world about it? or yell at the top of your lungs "F MY LIFE" ?

i'm not sure i have, but the people here sure get that feeling. check it out.

thanks to drew for introducing me to this delightful website.

today

as

i

poured

myself

some

kix cereal,

i found this one shaped like a pac-man.

today will be a good day.

the memory of trees

it is spring.
and it stinks. quite literally.

today as i was leaving work on the west side of campus, i noticed a familiar, undesirable smell.
THE TREE. the tree that i absolutely abhor has gone into bloom. this tree, despite it's rather adorable appearance, emits the worst odor imaginable.


what is strange, however, is that i seem to be the only one who is bothered by this particularly heinous scent. i have tried pointing it out multiple times to family members and friends, but they never agree to the foulness.
"i smell it," my mom said once. "but it's not that bad."
not that bad? hello. i can't walk past the tree without crinkling my nose and gagging.

there are a plethora of these disgusting trees that line the MTC field/parking lot on 9th east here in good ol' provo. it was there that i first noticed the odious aura. a few springs ago the scent waved over me as i rode my bike underneath their white blossoms. i had to stop to find the source of the terrible smell, and my nose led me straight to the innocent flowers that graced the branches of the trees towering over my head.

today, when i finished my classes and walked into my apartment, i was greeted by a heat wave. the place was so hot that i had to leave. i decided to take a walk up to campus and search for one of the gross timbers. i grabbed my ipod, named lazarus, and snagged my lemon-lime soda out of the fridge. normally i don't drink carbonation. i don't like the bubbles of death. but drew says that soda helps stomach aches, and i have had one for a couple of days. since he is perfect, he brought me the wanna-be sprite.
sipping my pop, i walked up the path on the south end of campus near the clyde building and listened to "shake that" by eminem--my guilty pleasure--on my ipod. i stared down each tree so that i could correctly identify the smelly culprit on the BYU website's tree tour.
eventually i found one, just as my music player had switched from the rapping profanity of eminem to "in a big country" by dashboard confessional.
aha! there it was, sitting innocently in between the widtsoe and eyering science buildings.

later, with help from the tree tour, i correctly identified the tree as an aristocrat pear.
THE HORROR.
for some reason i feel that knowing the proper name of the tree justifies my hatred.

how could a tree emit such a foul scent? i don't know. maybe the problem is not the tree, but my nose. i might have some mutant olfactory cells in my nasal cavity that don't agree with the tree-smell. perhaps my poor nose just can't tolerate the tree's desire to multiply and replenish (a flower is simply the reproductive organ of a plant. think of that next time you stick your nose in a daisy).

whether the problem is my nose or the tree, you will have to find out for yourself. sniff away.

can't stop the rain

so, a few years ago i discovered this gem.

it is my favorite short film.

done by the magnificent genius shane acker.

now, it is being turned into a feature film, and i am slightly furious for these reasons:

1. it's always a bit depressing to see something you discover suddenly become cool to everyone else. (as far as my life is concerned, think: vampires)

2. they are giving the characters VOICES.

NOOOOOOO

one of the reasons this movie is so cool is because the characters don't talk!

hollywood will ruin it.

oh, well. my only hope rests with the fact that tim burton is producing.

anyway, here y'all go.

9 by shane acker